The Winged Wonder

[Voice]

[This particular announcement begins with a close-up on one slightly-irritated looking breegull's face. The journal has gotten easier to open without hands, but it's still not always a cakewalk.

After a moment, though, her beak shifts into something resembling a smile - a little mocking, perhaps, but a smile nonetheless.]

So. Some heck of a birthday I have, right? Village looks like a pile of junk, Malnosso-guys going nuts, some dumb draft thing they didn't send me on, all this crud. And on top of all that, I still got my "present" from the Malnosso-guys to worry about. [She looks down at her wings pointedly to emphasize this.] So. Gotta cheer this place up a little, I think!

First 'n' foremost. It's my birthday today - s'when my first game came out, Banjo-Kazooie - so none of you had better forget! And I'm gonna need something really awesome. Maybe something even cooler than my hero party! As well as tons of presents, because a party's not a party without some presents -

[... but there is another problem, too.]

- whenever all this junk gets cleaned up, anyway. Is that even ever gonna happen? The fat ol' hag's cruddy amusement park looked better kept-up than this place and I was clearing out like half of the stupid stuff on the ground!

Anyway. [Almost idly, but:] How many of you other guys've had birthdays here? And what's it like for you weird non-cartoony-types, what with that getting-older thing and all?

[And because she can't filter:] Oh, hey, anybody know how to make some... I dunno, fake robot-y wings or something? [Eggman would be proud.] Marco said somethin' about "blacksmiths", whatever the heck that means.


[Action]

[Okay, so having a party now isn't really feasible. Some of the Pony House is missing, the whole village is still messy and broken (though it starts repairing later today!) and in general everything is a shambles. But this doesn't stop Kazooie from poking through the Item Shop and Weapons Shop for her Eggs and some decent snack food for her birthday.

People might catch her trying to awkwardly scoop chips - or crisps, as she'd call them; seed and nut mixes, candy and other assorted foods - perhaps even a whole cake - into a bag with the blunt hind-wings, or otherwise struggling with her items (but totally not asking for help or anything because that's lame) while she tries to navigate the shops. But eventually she'll get them outside! And maybe make a spectacle of herself eating them near or around the Fountain because she loves being the centre of attention. Come up and talk to her! She'll regale you with tales of her epic video game series.]

♋ CANCER ♋

• You will inadvertantly shoplift several times this week.
• You will find a turtle in your laundry.
• Your usually dominant manner is replaced by a coy submissiveness today. Go with it.
• Face facts, you have a dreadful singing voice.

[Kazooie doesn't usually pay much attention to her journal, outside of times where she wants to yammer on to someone or invite someone to go out with her. But anybody's curiosity would be piqued by a bunch of random words appearing, right?

Huh. Kazooie's never heard of this stuff before, but it sounds dumb and annoying and she doesn't like it. Especially not when the piece of crud is making fun of her voice! Her voice is just fine, thank you very much, stupid book!

Irritated, Kazooie goes to huff at the journal system.]

Is everybody's journal-thing being a jerk to them with these stupid words, or am I gonna hafta hit mine with a Grenade Egg?

[Evidently her coy submissiveness hasn't happened yet. Either that, or it doesn't apply to journals.]

These predictions are so dumb! "Submissive"? Me? Pah! I'd sooner stick my face in ol' Stinkpot again! [And she snorts audibly.]

... I bet none of them are gonna come true for me. I'm too awesome to do any of this!

[Spoke way, way too soon, Kazooie.]

What's the dumbest prediction you guys got? And did any of the really stupid junk come true for anybody else?

This has gotta be the lamest thing the Malnosso-guys've done yet!

[Even after she talks to others, though, Kazooie can't get over the journal insulting her. It's consuming her to the point where she's quite deliberately deciding that she's going to go out of her way to make sure that she'll undo every prediction. If she sees a turtle, she'll kick it out on its dumb shell! If she gets a chance to do something, it'll be as dominantly and loudly as possible! She's going to make darn sure she doesn't steal, and she will sing nicely like the bird she is!

... Too bad none of those will work in quite the way she envisions (as unfortunately for her, succeeding at failure is not really success... that was one of the alternate horoscopes she could've gotten, too).

( Horrible singing and stealing action on the 27th for those who want it! )

( And some coy submissiveness action on the 28th! )

Throughout all of this mess... well, chores still have to happen. Including laundry. Let's see what kind of interesting turtles she'll meet...

Actually, come to think of it, this entire event is going to prove to be pretty interesting. But that's Luceti - and Kazooie's life - for you!]